What Would You Change If You Could?

"There's things I'll remember. There's things I'll forget. I miss you- I guess that I should. Three- thousand five hundred miles away, What would you change if you could? I need a phone call. I need a plane ride. I need a raincoat... I wish it was a small world because I'm lonely for the big town."

-Counting Crows



Begining of April-ish, 2009


Brie in Tanzania Count: Ten Months


The last few days we have had awesome weather. I wake up and it is sunny with blue sky. It gets hotter and hotter, then around 4.30 dark clouds rolls in but somehow it is still sunny. They just encroach like a sudden night. Suddenly the sky opens up and it dumps huge drops of rain. Lighting and thunder put on a show together and unlike Oregon, we always have lightning in Tanzania. It flashes every night and sometimes all night and sometimes without rain even. It give a strobe effect to my room as I try to sleep. Rivers run down the divets in our main dirt road and I skip and jump over them on my way to run errands. The wind howels throwing water through every crack and crevice in my house- water pours through the windows and floods under the doors- until I am submerged in a wild ocean. Out the window, it is just green and grey colliding, as the grey mist sweeps through our valley having it's way with the brilliant emerald vegetation.


I am in my own wild ocean- still trying to figure out what I can do in my own little corner of Tanzania. My villagers have finally agreed to be tested for AIDS as long as I do the testing. PC prefers that we do not come into close contact with African blood and I don't know how to stab people with needles anyways, so I am working on other options. Still I am a bit floored that they prefer me to know their results insted of anyone they actually really know. My Swahili must be really bad since their main concern is people finding out that their postitive... maybe they figure that I could not tell anyone even if I wanted to. Now I am creating a short lesson plan that is going to be taught everywhere I go. I have started teaching it in a surprising way. I went to Maria's little bar one night with Anna on my back and all the village men were hanging out there. They bought me a beer and I realized that maybe forming a men's group is to constricting and formal to deal with the issues that I want to address. However, when I am at the bar with them they always want to discuss why I am there.... so now they are getting an earful. I am making an effort to go hang out with them once a week. Last week we talked about the importance of using a condom. I had nothing written out or any pictures, just sat casually with a beer in my hand and told them what I thought. To my surprise they were very open with their concerns and wanted to hear what I have to say. Maybe once they are more into it the teaching will get more formal but I felt like this was a good start to get the conversation going. I am going to try to find a way to get a ton of condoms to use as invitations to the eventual testing day. I think I will just walk around the village and give some to everyone, that way they won't feel uncomfortable having to ask for them. So now I am just getting ready for the big day, which I hope can be as soon as July.


School the other day was surprising. I went prepared to teach about AIDS transmission with all the pictures drawn. Pictures and charades work really well with the students. Also my diaherrea lesson through pictures went over really well. (PC might be the only job that you are able to perfect drawing a Tanzanian in the "Choo Position" having diaherra). Anyways, turns out that I am not teaching that day because the children are building speed bumps out of dirt on our main road. (Motorcycles are driving too fast.) So no teaching and no one told me but this is kama kawaida (Like normally). Us teachers are just supposed to supervise these activities. Then the Mwalimu Mkuu tells me that today no teacher will beat any of the kids. I am floored. I threw a big tantrum the day before in front of all the teachers and some kids where I screamed and stormed out of the school. There had already been two entire classes beaten (including Katherine's, who is now sitting next to me drawing innocently with crayons as I write this) and one little girl so much so that she heaved with tears. So apparently, I made a bit of a point and even though it is only one day, this is still some kind of progress. And my mom always told me that throwing fits never accomplishes anything. ;-)

In the afternoon, the entire school comes to my house because supposidly I am going to get bit by a snake unless they clear the surrounding area. Hundreds of students swarm my house like busy little bees armed with hoes and I wished I had a camera. Rebecca (Katherine's sister) cleans my room, including; making my bed, washing my windows, mopping and sweeping the floors and folding my clothes. Girls do dishes, plant flowers, sweep out spiders and wash clothes. All 15 of my teachers look on shouting orders from all parts of my house both inside and outside. Kimulimuli and are are both sort of at a loss of what to do. He weaves around my feet meowing and once when there are too many students in the room for him climbs into my fire place and halfway up the chimney. Now the floor is so clean I would eat off of it.

I have just discovered that 20% of my primary school students are OVCs (orphans and vulnerable children)- crazy. one fifth.

My village executive officer (VEO), who I am not a big fan of, wife just died- everyone is saying AIDS (although obviously we have not been tested.) He has two more wives, but this was his first wife. Anyways, I did not realize it but his eldest son is one of my students. He is a good boy with a nice smile, one of those kids that you know will be really attractive when he is older. He always raises his hand to answer my questions in class. It breaks my heart that now he has no mother. yet he just took some standard examination and did very well on it. Today he was trimming a tree by my house- just like nothing had happened. I wanted to go to him and give him a little hug, but I have no idea what grief is like in Africa. a tweleve year old boy might not be please to have the eccentric teacher go hug him in front of the others.

My school has requested that I write a grant for new choos (holes in the ground for toilets) for the students. Right now we have seven holes which is not enough for the thousand students. It should be said that I am not passionate about the idea of building toilets, however, obviously it is health related as so many of the issues that face our community are caused from feces in water or food. So I am writing to get money to help build the new buildings for the choos. But if I have to be know for building toilets, I am putting a little bit of 'brie' into this project: one side of the building I am hoping to paint a world map and on the other side a map of Tanzania. This will provide something to look at while the kids wait in line and also adds my interests of art and geography to the project. I am also hoping to add an AIDS mural of some sort to one wall. So building toilets might not be so bad after all, if it is helpful and being used and I am able to add some flare.