Gender Relations

So I think I should go into what I have been learning about gender relations and health. The life expectancy in Tanzania is 51 years old. Over 10 percent of children die before the age of 5 and the AIDS rate nationwide is 7% and much more prevalent in women. This brings me to gender issues. I was warned that this would be the hardest part of my service- watching how women and children are treated while not being able to intervene. Men here often have more than one wife, and women are expected to do the majority of the work around the home. Children, we are told, are basically slaves, and the father is the ruler in the home. Girls are not prioritized or valued. Most young women do not attend school past the age of 14. We are told that by the age of 14 most of these girls are sexually active with the majority of there first sexual experience being rape or extreme pressure. For example, it is not uncommon here for an older man to pay for a young girl's school fees in exchange for sex, many times this is with the child's own teacher. The thought of all this is sickening to me. The Peace Corps has explained that part of my job her is to teach life skills and increase the self-esteem of these young women.
Upon hearing all of this, I have been closely observing my host family. I am very impressed with there relationships and I would like to describe them a bit more to you. My Baba, I have discovered used to be in the military. I thought he was married to Mama Simba, but in fact she is of no relation and she and her son just live with us. Recently another Mama has moved in Mama Michael. She also has two very young children and no husband around. I do not have enough language to ask where these Babas are. My baba so far is so different from this image of a Tanzanian man. He shows great interest in the children and even calls them in to play in front of him for entertainment. He talks with them over dinner and laughs when they are silly. As for who wears the pants in the family, I would say it is my Mama, he might have the final say so, but behind that man is a great woman. He would be silly to not see what a good thing he has with her. Sh is from a tribe in the South, so she looks slightly different than most people in Kilosa. She is beautiful, she is young, she has given him two sons and two daughters all of them are adorable and as charming as she is. Yesterday , when I got home from school she was in the courtyard making Sambusas with my sisters. There was about a dozen neighbor children gathered around watching her. She had her battery operated radio and was singing dancing and laughing. I know they came to be with her. She has a great sense of humor and is always welcoming and happy. She listens when my Baba talks, but even without understanding them, I can tell he is totally in love with her. So I wonder about this gender disparity. I worry about my eight year old sister, Bahati, what will her life be like? I wonder about my ten year old brother, Rasheedy, how when he is so cute and innocent and loves his sisters, I do not see him being a chauvinistic man. Then I think of all the Tanzanian men I have ever met and wonder about them, they all seem like wonderful caring people. I hope that there is a change on the horizon and women become educated equals.